Five Indications That You Might Be Watching Too Much C-SPAN

Lord knows we here at CableFAX have the greatest respect and admiration for what our friends at C-SPAN produce on screen, online and, in the DC area, on C-SPAN Radio, and elsewhere on satellite and HD radio. We also salute cable operators for providing this gift to the American people. Still, too much of a good thing, even C-SPAN, can be dangerous. Therefore, as a public service, we give you a few indicators that could signal you are experiencing a C-SPAN overload.

1. You have 3 phone lines installed in your home; one for Republicans, another for Democrats and a third for Independents. More than that, you tell your friends not to call you if they’ve done so in the past 30 days.

2. You ditch the family car in favor of a school bus.

3. Instead of gently waking your spouse and kids each morning, you bang a gavel on the kitchen table and yell, “The House will come to order!”

4. You begin to use phrases like “Can you believe the Senate invoked cloture yesterday pursuant to a vote on a rule to the previous question?” and “Did you hear what Kevin Martin said on The Communicators Saturday night?”

5. When you take a break at work your co-workers notice you are humming baroque trumpet music. When they inquire you tell them it’s the music played during C-SPAN’s Washington Journal. In addition, you actually know it’s the 3rd movement of The Concerto (#2) for Solo Trumpet and Strings by Johann Melchior Molter (1696-1795).